Getting a job done quickly has its benefits, but that isn’t always the case with sex. If you’re wondering how to achieve a longer-lasting erection (and therefore have longer-lasting sex), you’re not alone – one study of over 11,000 men revealed that 21 per cent ejaculated within one minute of sex, and 70 per cent reported sex ending before they wanted it to1.
But don’t despair, there are sex positions that can help you turn that sprint into more of a marathon for times when a quickie just won’t do.
Sex positions that allow you to relax more – such as The Cowgirl – give you better control over your levels of arousal. You won’t be under so much pressure and you can concentrate on keeping your orgasm at bay. Try tightening your pelvic muscles if you feel yourself getting too excited, and this should easily bring things under control again.
Don’t be afraid to pause things if you feel you’re getting close – take time to kiss, or concentrate on your partner for a while before you’re ready to go back in. Spending a few minutes breathing slowly and deeply before sex, as well as during it, also helps you go for longer as it forces you to relax and can keep your arousal under control for a few more all-important minutes.
Women on top
Sex positions with the woman on top can work wonders for a man’s endurance2. Not only are you less stimulated, you don’t need to support your weight, so you can just lie back, relax and enjoy the view. If you ask her to go slowly, she can control the intensity and may have more willpower when it comes to keeping things slow and steady.
Sit it out
Try positions where it’s difficult to thrust too quickly. By sitting cross-legged with your partner on your lap, for example, you’ll both still enjoy the intensity of deep penetration, but it’s easier to slow things down and kiss for a while. Even if you’re tempted to go for a bit of over-excited thrusting, your position means you need to keep things going slow.
The shallow end
It’s best to avoid sex positions that encourage deep thrusting, as these can often tip you over the edge sooner than you want. So doggy style, for example, is a no-no. The lazy doggy (where you modify doggy style by lying down once in position), however, can work wonders. It’s a slower, more relaxed version and while it keeps the excitement of rear-entry, it calms the intensity as you can’t go deep so easily. Focus on small, shallow movements and try edging just a couple of inches inside at first.